Me: “Hello Discovercard, I would like to get my interest rate reduced”

Discover Rep: “Im sorry Mr Craig, but your APR of 18% is the lowest we are offering for your account.”

Me: “Ive been a loyal customer for quite a while.  Are there any promos available?”

Discover Rep: “No your account does not qualify.”

Me: “What do you mean, my account?”

Discover Rep: -Silence-

Me: “Ok nevermind, so you won’t even lower it a point?”

Discover Rep: “No, Mr Craig.  I can help you pay it off faster with one of our enhanced automated payment plans.”

Me: “Would it be as fast as paying it off in full right now?”

Discover Rep: “No”

Me: “Ok, well Ill go ahead and do that then”

At which point, I did exactly that.  Ahhh, feels nice.

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